The Pretext
Joney looked at this life and he mostly saw insignificant events, untold truths and badly performed, sad comedies. He wanted his life to amount to something valuable and his existence to carry more meaning, so he committed himself to few “eternal” values and he tried very hard to live by them, only to find himself alone on a very difficult journey.
He had to recognize that he was not thinking straight. Who needs values? Who wants to adhere to things that are difficult to uphold, do not necessarily bring them immediate benefits, nor do they nurture their famished egos! Nobody wants this losing proposition! Maybe Pope Francis and very few like him!
What people really want are pretexts. Good enough reasons, accepted by their surroundings, to justify their emotions, opinions, attitudes, words and actions!
When you are under the protection of a good pretext you are in a safer place. You can allow yourself more irrational and selfish behavior and still be tolerated in the name of your strong pretext. Here are few illustrative examples:
The pretext of the student is her studies. When she is studying she is undisturbed!
The pretext of the mother is her children. When she is taking care of them, she is irreproachable!
The pretext of the orphan is the absence of a role model to follow. Their behavior is accepted and justified by themselves and most people around them by the absence of one or both of their parents.
The pretext of the mourner is his sorrow. His misfortune protects him!
The pretext of the sick is his sickness. While he is ailing, he can be very demanding and people accept it!
The pretext of the alcoholic is his addiction. While he is drunk, many of his stupidities are forgiven!
The pretext of a seemingly hard worker is his dedication to his work at the expense of his private life. When he is working “hard”, even if he has an obnoxious attitude and he makes people feel indebted to him for whatever he is doing (while getting paid for it), his co-workers would still find justifications for his attitude and behaviors caused by his stress and his overwhelming workloads!
The examples are numerous and cover almost every situation in the life of every individual. As Voltaire wisely said: “to the wicked, everything serves as pretext”
Our friend, Joney, fascinated by the power of pretexts, decided to find a valid pretext that will allow him to carry on with his own comedy for few more years, and be largely left alone in doing whatever he enjoys doing.
He started his search by assessing what he’s already got. He was hoping to uncover a strong enough pretext that would allow him to continue his journey peacefully. He quickly realized that he’s got more than most people dream to have in their lifetime. He is surrounded by the love of his family and his friends. Life has been generous with him and it has given him more than most. He has a beautiful and intelligent wife, healthy and smart kids, and enough money not to worry about it every day! As he was recanting all the things that he can be grateful for, it suddenly dawned on him; he found what his pretext has always been and should continue to be!
Providing to all the people he loves, joy and peace of mind, protecting all of them from any material need, and making sure that he has all the mental, material, physical and spiritual power necessary to do all this, seemed to him a strong enough pretext to support and justify all the things he has been doing and will continue to do!
Joney was extremely happy and relieved, until another thought started to clutter his mind: what if he has been providing what people didn’t really need or want from him? What if he has been giving more than they could take? Would this pretext still hold?
Sure it will, as long as he finds enough of the right people that are interested in receiving what he has to give! The search continues every day to find these receivers. Actually, this search is becoming the better pretext for Joney in this eternal comedy called life!